One Sign of Adulthood: The First-Name Basis Accelerated Learning Resources

One Sign of Adulthood: The First-Name Basis

Titles and names are such funny things. Growing up, I was always taught to give adults titles, be it Ms. Mr. or Mrs., or even Uncle and Aunt. As my mother told me many times, under no circumstances was anyone over the age of 20 to ever be called anything but these respectful titles. It occurred to me last month when I turned 20½ that this rule should probably change a bit.

I’ve met so many people in the last few years; adults in every definition of the word with children and grandchildren of their own who actually find it awkward if I call them by anything other than their first name. They introduce themselves with only one word and no hint of a last name for me to latch onto. Counselors, recruiters, GSIs, even interviewers who prefer to be Raj instead of Mr. Wali and Amanda instead of Ms. Barks. I still remember my freshman year when a professor I was very fond of asked me to call her Ann instead of Dr. Phillips. I avoided saying her name for weeks because I was so embarrassed.

What a strange thing it is when I falter in writing an email to a future coworker, not in the content, but simply in the salutation. And even though sometimes I retreat to the wonders of Netiquette and get away with a simply “Hello,” I know that won’t last me very long.

This is one of those moments when you realize that you really have grown up and that people expect you to be an adult now; perhaps it’s not as immortalized in the American psyche as getting the keys to your first car or going to college or doing taxes by yourself the first time, but it’s important to me nonetheless.

The number of these startling happenings—occasions when the reality of adulthood seems much closer than it was just two seconds ago—keeps increasing, but as one of my favorite spiritual guides likes to say, it’s all just part of the process.

Accelerated Learning Resources